When I first wrote this blog, I intended to keep it strictly for work as a form of marketing for my brand, aka me. Haha. 
As you can see, the very first articles are for lifestyle, fashion, beauty, and other things. When I have more free time, I’ll write extra articles about nails and whatnot because that’s our main thing here. 

Why I’m fucked?

I already printed out my business cards before Memorial Day. I have two sets of cards with different designs and various information, one for work and one for pleasure. The work cards don’t have my email and phone number because I’m just a private person and don’t have time to cater to customers’ texts and calls whenever they want. This has happened before.

So usually, if I have an assistant, the work card will always link to my assistant’s. Lol. Cheeky, I know. But it got the job done, and I’m free from handling all that because I’m just bad at managing texts/calls. You’ll likely have to wait unless it’s urgent. I won’t pick up the phones or answer the texts immediately unless it’s booty calls. JK. 

But if you’re not my mom, dad, or girly, you’ll feel ignored even if I wasn’t ignoring you. Not on purpose, of course. I tend to process something a few times over in my head before starting to respond. I learned it the hard way to process like that as not to have any leftover negative feelings or emotions.

Then I took a vacation for a bit over two weeks. And that’s when I started to pour my emotions into the blog as a form of destressing. 
When I’m finally back home and catch up to work, I realize, “Oh fuck”. Fuck. FUck. FuCk. FucK.

I have more personal articles than others. Hence, I haven’t given out a single business card. Lol. 
I have this wishy-washy feeling played out that this is the perfect time to give a client my business card. And then I let it slide every time because I was afraid they’d read things going on in my life, et cetera. Lol.

Not only that, I was afraid I’d get judged so hard. I’m not living in a big city where nobody would give a damn about my two cents. Here is a small town, everybody knows everybody else, it’s dangerous to have a bad rapport.

I also won’t have time to juggle two blogs if I want to keep my personal life away from my work life. It’s just a bit too much. Yet I recently know a person who has 15 freaking blogs. I’m not sure how they manage all that on their own.
It already took me around three months to work on this blog, just the way I want it to appear. 

When you think about it, you tell developer A how you want this website to appear and how ABCD should look; it will not go your way on the first try. As the website proceeds, things will change; I change my mind; he adds his professional opinions that maybe A doesn’t look good on this part, perhaps B looks better here, etc. So we kept going back and forth on the same topics a lot of the time with tiny tweeny changes. That’s why it took so long. And the blog is still underdeveloping, believe it or not.

My developer was inactive, so I need to hit up a new one. The different guy that optimized my Amazon affiliate site offered me a jacked-up price that I eventually bargained for half of it. Like I’m not even sure it’s because I’m an Asian, I’m naturally good at haggling, or he thought I was rich because of my Amazon site, so he could ask for whatever the F he wants. It reeks of dishonesty, so I decide to take a step back and not order from him.

Yeah, I feel pretty fucked up that I’m a very private person and keep things for myself mostly, but it’s also going to be published what’s going on behind closed doors. 
It makes me feel naked and exposed. But as someone who worked in fashion, you’re naked literally and figuratively.

So I may get used to this feeling again, just in a different sense.
Would it affect me or affect how people visualize what I am as a person? 

The first, and hopefully not the last 

A month later, I still haven’t given out any business card until a regular client came in.
She and I already talked about the blog even before my cards were shipped. And she has been waiting for a whole month. She comes in every few weeks, so I technically can’t duck forever.

We exchanged good Netflix series and a bunch of things. She said I shouldn’t change the blog’s voice even if potentially there are people who read it. And it’s good advice. 

I can’t begin to tell you that I have a few “friends” who try to change how the narrative plays out because they’re also writers. I haven’t given them the blog link, just a snippet screenshot of it while still underdeveloped.
I thought that wasn’t nice of them because it’s my blog, you know. I can write whatever the hell I want, even if it’s a piece of shit.

Even if I say I write it for me, and I don’t care what others think, deep down, I care. I think it affects my image a lot. Reading somebody’s journal is the most enthralling and fastest way to learn about a person. Like please keep the professional image of me instead of the dirty little perv I am. Lol.

I also keep telling myself; this is not journalism; it’s creative writing. You can’t compare the two. I’m merely expressing myself here, how I feel about certain things. Although I added reports about events, it’s still heavily influenced by my personal feelings. So there’s that. It’s not Wall Street Journal, and it will never be.

Finally, I gave in and delivered my first business card to the so-called client. She knows who she is. Lol. It should link to this blog, Twitch (which I sometimes stream for fun), and my Amazon Affiliate site. 
I will advertise for my Amazon Affiliate site soon, so don’t be surprised when you see flyers around town. But I’ll do one residential area per month because I’m not that rich. Lol.

And I don’t know how it’ll work when I decide to do flyers because it’s an e-commerce-ish store. Technically I have to advertise online only. Making flyers is actually a huge risk for me. There’s a meager chance they’d actually pull out the phone to punch in the website address.

But I hope you’ll save time and effort each month just not going to many physical stores for supplies and shop on my online store instead. Of course, it’s not going to charge you anything extra. As you can see, it links straight to Amazon, and the pricing remains the same. It acted as a middle man and sorted out a lot of the bad merchants. In the end, you pay through Amazon, and it’s safer that way.

We still can’t run away from grabbing groceries, but that would be the dream. One day when you wake up, there’s this gorgeous human being, or AI even, ring your bell, put your bag(s) of groceries down as you leave out a big sigh, and contemplate their nice behind when they walk away.

Ok, enough dreaming. As for Google Ads, I’m considering it; I’m also afraid of it because I know Google doesn’t like Amazon Affiliate sites, not at all. They’re advertising for Amazon, technically, and imaging all the money was driving away from Google. They could ban my Google Ad account for that.

So it may be harder for me to do more marketing in the future if I happen to open more businesses. Who knows. Let’s cross our fingers and hope that Google is nice to me.
I will have to pay for a different developer to maintain Google Ads during the advertising period. It’s a whole new world opening up right now, and I’ll let you in every step of the process.

Though, it just felt so good to be able to give out a business card. I don’t know how to explain the feeling. It just felt excited like, woohoo, look Ma, I’m “kinda” successful now. Lol. You can see my name, all my glory, and gore on those websites.

Something that I’ve been working on for the past few months. I don’t know how I did 2 websites, stream around 12 hours/week while working 60-hours+ a week as well, but I did. Lol. I feel proud of myself. And the New Orleans trip was just a much-needed getaway.

I dropped Twitch because it’s a lot of work than I initially leaped into it. I mean, I started for fun, but I did see a way to make money, so I got a little greedy there? But I can’t keep up with a 60-hour-something job. It’s okay if you stream for fun, but definitely not for money-wise with the little time you have.

You basically stream consistently for at least 2-5 years before your online community started to develop. So during your first years, you make 0, or very little. But after that, it’s wild. Imagine each subscriber throwing $4.99 at you, and there are like 3,000 people like that. Do the math. Even if after-tax, you only get $3 something/subscriber, it’s still a lot.

Your subscribers are the people funding your monthly expenses. Suppose you don’t know how people play games all day and make money. This is how they do it. You could easily earn so much that it’s worth quitting your job, so you have more time for self-care. And you can potentially earn a lot more if you have some bosom to show off. Lol. It’s sad, but it’s true.

I think I can do it, but to do that, I have to drop my IRL job, which I don’t want to. I can’t be streaming with a fixed schedule for the next 5 years when I start to manage other websites. RIP. And I should drop a few projects as my tarot card lady hit me in the head that I’ve had way too many plans going on. Oopsie. She nailed it!

Anywho, hopefully, she’s not the only client I gave out my business card to if I could get over my fear of sharing. I have 999 cards to go, man. Lol. Wish me luck.

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